How the Madden Curse will work this season

Most NFL fans know of the famous "Madden Curse". Since most NFL fans don't read this, allow me to explain. The football video game series Madden (insert year here) always features a football player on the cover, each and every year. It's usually not the MVP or whatever, but someone who's made a difference for their team or broke a record or whatever. At first, it was an honor, something higher than the Super Bowl (maybe just to me). But now...

It's something else.

For as long as anyone can remember, those whose picture was placed on the cover have been "cursed" with so much bad luck the following season (and generally their career), most wonder why they haven't opted out of life itself.
Example: 2002, Daunte Culpepper, quarterback for the Minnesota Vikings at the time. Before, he was a beast. People cried when they heard the name Minnesota Vikings (I did, anyway). After the cover, he hops between like four teams and goes through numerous injuries that affected his game play for the worse. What happened to him? He started for the Lions last season 8 games in. He then got injured again and was out the rest of the season.
Another: 2004, Michael Vick, then-quarterback for the Atlanta Falcons. The QB everyone dreamed of having on their team. He could run, he could throw, he was a beast in the pocket. Why this man did not have Super Bowl rings was beyond anyone and everyone. What happens to him? Dog fighting. Goes to jail and is shunned by the world.
Can't stop now: 2009, Brett Favre. Retired and was given the honor of being on the cover of Madden 2009. But was that enough for him? Hell no! He decides to un-retire and sign with the Jets, taking them 9-7, ultimately throwing the ENTIRE AFC East off its axis, causing the 11-5 New England Patriots to MISS the playoffs (yes, I am blaming their miss of the playoffs on Brett Favre and the Curse). What happened? Hell if we know. He's in football limbo. No one knows if he's coming back or not, and to the Minnesota Vikings of all teams.

But now, this year's cover is different. There are TWO players, Larry Fitzgerald and Troy Polamalu, the biggest beasts you will find anywhere.




















This begs the question: What will the curse do? Can it affect TWO players? Will it cancel out? What will happen? Well, after much thought, I have the answer.

EVERYONE else will be affected EXCEPT these two players. Tom Brady will blow out his other knee, Brett Favre will lose his arm COMPLETELY, and everyone else will just have a failure of a season. You heard it from me first.

You're not Michael, Favre.

Don't get me wrong. I think you're incredible. You're probably one of my favorite quarterbacks. But this is getting out of hand. You're not not amazing enough to come out of retirement a thousand times like Michael Jordan. You're an average aging quarterback who should throw in the towel. We saw what happened with the Jets last season when they finished off 9-7, and I don't imagine that you'll do any better with the Vikings. You're 39 and definitely not getting any younger. No offense.

Brett, you've had your time. Now throw in the towel and move on with your life. It's not that we don't think you can play. We KNOW you can play, but as far as playing decently...well, we don't. I don't think you can help Minnesota anymore than their current quarterbacks can. And this whole "revenge against Green Bay" isn't making you look any better, and it definitely will look bad when you lose to them, I'm sorry to say. I was excited when you came out of retirement last year and went to the Jets. But then I saw how you played and your injuries and whatever. You just can't do it like you used to!

And look on the bright side: You retire at age 39! Everyone else has to work until their 65 and with as much gray as...you have now, but that's besides the point! Retire, stay retired, go fishing in Mississippi, and just love life! Leave football to the younger guys. Hell, go be an analyst like Aikman. You definitely got what it takes to do that, at least. Don't push yourself so far that you'll be forced to leave football with a nasty injury. Play it safe!

I'm Just Saying....

First off, all my new posts will be on this blog. I no longer have only a sports blog and only a thoughts blog, considering my opinions on sports....are my thoughts. So yes, blog-merging has been completed.

Next, I decided to do this little thing I call "I'm Just Saying", where I point out the obvious to you. Then you can agree or be wrong with me. Either is acceptable.

• Ok, to all who are anti-certain-series-of-books: you not liking it won't make your friends instantly change their minds. "The vampires sparkle." "WHAT? You're right! This no longer makes sense!" Seriously, if you don't like it, don't read it. And calling it "bad" doesn't change the fact that it's successful. At all. I'm just saying.
• Hallmark should immediately air movies that are original. I walked to the kitchen and saw my mom watching a movie on the Hallmark channel. Here's a summary of the movie (as well as every single other Hallmark movie, because I've seen her watch these movies every day), and now you can decide what kind of Hallmark movie you want too!: a single (man/woman) finds out that they (are stuck with their now-deceased siblings children/are in debt and owe the bank thousands/are in debt and are stuck with their now-deceased siblings children) somewhere in (the country/the heart of New York City), and, by the end, find (Jesus/their true love). You've now seen every Hallmark movie! I'm just saying.
• (To the media) Insulting Michael Jackson for as long as I can remember and then changing your view about him after he dies just doesn't cut it. Pick a side. I'm just saying.

Hmm this is pretty short...(TWSS)...wow wasn't planning to say that.